“29/5/10 is Gappy Tooth Industries’ 8th birthday. “Wow”, they thought, “eight years; let’s spend some effort getting a well promoted, high quality lineup together”. This is the tale of how that noble sentiment fell apart…
Firstly, Readings’ Amy’s Ghost cancelled, because one of them forgot it was her hen night. Well, as excuses go, it’s certainly original. They were very apologetic, and at least gave us loads of notice, so we let them off, and shall book them again later in the year. ON the very day of the Nightshift listings deadline Countryside from Somerset stepped into the “out of county” middle slot. Well, that’s all good, then.
Friday 21st Mr Gappy gets back from a week away to find a message from headliners The Elrics to say they couldn’t play, because they’d split up. Mr Gappy’s observation that they might want to consider splitting up at a quarter past eleven on Saturday instead, seeing as it was only a week ago, feel on deaf ears. Nevermind, even at short notice, with the able assistance of Mr J Moto, Esq, a replacement band were found in the form of excellent goth sludgers Undersmile. Now I can relax and go to London on Thursday night to see some spectral reverby music, thought Mr Gappy.
Wrong again, as Fred, Kidlington’s foremost badly dressed rave-pudding and the man behind Punt stars We Are Ugly went and hurt his head and had to go to hospital. Luckily he’s alright, but can’t go near anything bangin’, rinsin’ or large under doctor’s orders, and it left Mr G in a scrabble to replace him. Friday afternoon brought a message from the brilliant Samuel Zasada (also Punt performers, incidentally), saying that they’d fill the gap.
“Talk about cutting it fine to get things sorted for our 8th birthday gig”, sighed Mr Gappy, getting back to his public sector drone work, and feeling half asleep because going to listen to swirly sounds in a London church midweek doesn’t sit well with a 6.30 alarm clock. “I can relax tonight, and then live it up at GTI, followed by Acid Mothers Temple on Sunday. I’ve done pretty well to keep this gig on track”.
Ah, hubris, you cruel trickster. When returning to his house after work, Gappy discovered a message from Countryside, to say one of them had hurt their leg, and they had to stay in bumpkinworld. Yes, he now had to find a replacement for the replacements, to perform with the two other replacements. Having discovered that The Replacements had split up in the early 90s, Mr G phoned everyone he’d ever met, and finally got hold of the towering talents of D Gwalia.
So it came to pass that the lineup for Gappy Tooth Industries’ gig on Saturday 29/5/10 ran like this:
20.00 Doors
20.50 D Gwalia
21.25 Samuel Zasada
22.20 Undersmile
23.00 everyone goes downstairs in the Sheaf for a nice relaxing ale.
“Blimey,” reflected the aforementioned Gappy, “£4.50 a ticket? Even if I kept all the money that wouldn’t even be minimum wage for all the effort…but that’s what makes it fun, even after eight eventful years”.
And the moral of the story? Mr Gappy will reveal it if you come to the gig. And buy him a beer.